Update 31/01/19

We have been quite busy today. This afternoon, Elder Son had an appointment at the local surgery for a vaccination booster. He is very nervous about needles and asked me to go with him to help keep him calm. Lovely Husband drove us and Younger Son was amazed that his parents were right after all! He hardly felt a thing and didn’t even realise that the nurse had finished the injection – she distracted him so well and with such expertise.

After that, we went to B&Q for a few items for DIY jobs that we have been thinking about sorting for ages, but have not actually done anything about, if you see what I mean. I got very tired in the shop, so we came straight home after buying what we needed.

Butterfly brooch - Sonrisa

Butterfly brooch – Sonrisa

I have been feeling very low about my appearance in the last few weeks. I am becoming reluctant to take my photos for this blog as I feel so ugly and unattractive. My hair is continuing to get thinner, although I had hoped that stopping the dye and going grey would help. I am also getting much fatter, despite trying to keep to a better diet. We did talk to the consultant at my last appointment and he said that the steroids are the issue, but I cannot cut them down any further as they help combat my lung problems.

All in all, I feel horrible when I look in the mirror. Lovely Husband is so kind and, yes, lovely when he tells me that I am beautiful to him, but I feel ugly to myself.

I don’t know what to do about these feelings.

Counselling tomorrow.

Best wishes,


About The Librain

Retired School Librarian
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